Have you ever had days where you failed at something and just didn't know why? You've had a super crappy day and you constantly look for ways to explain it. You forgot your wallet at home; damn, I'm so forgetful. Your boss gives you a hard time at work; I must really be on his bad side. You're constantly looking for logic in your failures. That resonates with me. There is always the constant question of "What could I have done differently?", "How could I have done something so stupid?", "Why did this happen?", and I think the search for finding the logic in an illogical world is what draws me to this book. Colin searches for a way to give his life logic in an illogical world but to his benefit, it doesn't work the way he thought. His past relationships with every Katherine become mathematically derived in his head, as he searches for what he calls his "Eureka moment." It comes, but not in the same way you'd expect it to. And I think we all search for that, in the end. This was a random book that was given to me by a co-worker and how serendipitous that I received it. In our lives, we all search for that little bit of logic in the world, but when everything is said and done, we must learn to let go and live illogically.
Modern civilization has given us many comforts and conveniences but has caused, and continues to cause, the destruction of the very place we live. We need the Earth and habitat to live. We cannot continue on this path of destruction and expect to keep the lights on, maintaining business as usual. “Going Dark” by Dr. Guy McPherson connects the dots and presents layers of compelling scientific evidence that human extinction is imminent in the near-term. Most people would find this information depressing and it is. However, I also found it liberating. Guy encourages us to live life with a sense of urgency. We all get to die, we just don't know when. Having this knowledge can impose a burden of grief and sorrow that fluctuates, but it has also allowed me to recognize and cherish those fleeting moments of joy and the courage to seek the truth. How would you live your life if you understand your days are numbered?
At 18, I moved from a rural mountain town to Chicago for college. I knew nothing and was still grappling with the fact that everything I'd known, everything I'd been used to in high school and as a child, was over-- the people I'd grown up alongside had all moved on. With new roommates and friends, I was withdrawn and spent a lot of time in the halls of the Harold Washington Library. By pure chance, I stumbled across The Thousand Autumns of Jacob de Zoet by David Mitchell and chose to read it based on the cover art. It ended up becoming one of the most influential books in my life. It focuses on the idea of temporality and belonging. Throughout our lives, we brush against the lives of others, sharing wisdom, experience, intimacy and heartache, unconsciously changing one another no matter how long we spend together. Yet we always leave one another because we have no control over our own lives. Life is a fragile thing, especially when we are young and it is in flux, and how we begin is almost never how we end. At the same time, we so frequently worry about whether we fit in or belong, trying to figure out whether we can really connect to the people around us. That fear, that hesitance, is what holds us away. The main character of the book is in a place where he is legally barred from socializing with a people that he is so desperately curious about, but he manages to make them love him anyway through whatever channels he can. I started spending a lot of time observing other people, seeing where their lives took them. I went on many late-night walks by myself, just looking at lights in the windows and thinking about who was there, what their lives were like and what circumstances brought them there. This period of my life led me to a great love of talking with strangers-- I will strike up a conversation with literally anyone. I have learned so much about what it means to be human from simple conversations with people on a street corner, with a barista who is having a hard day, with a doorman who knows more about Lower Wacker Drive than I do. This book opened the door to my empathy for others, and it has changed the way I perceive everything."